precious days

Just over a week of holidays left. How sad. Still so much to do, and so much nothing-ness to fit in, too. If I’m counting correctly, I’ve only stayed at home for the entire day four times so far these holidays. Of course, sometimes I "go out" and don’t really do anything at all, but, as has been defined by others, if you set foot outside the house, then you’re "going out".

(If you want to be pedantic about semantics, you would say that stepping outside your house and into your backyard would then count as "going out" when, of course, realistically, it hardly qualifies. But, because it is holidays, and we should not look so far into these sort of things, we are going to ignore that. Please do not get pedantic about semantics here. I have not the time to debate trivial matters.)

I have watched six movies in three weeks of holidays. I’d say that’s quite above my average, but I’m not sure what my average is exactly, so I won’t make unsupported claims here. Don’t know if I want to single out a favourite of the six, but I suppose ‘Ice Age 3’ was pretty funny. ‘The Proposal’ was also quite funny, and quite sweet, too.

Yes, I did watch ‘Hannah Montana’. And, no, it was not unbearable or lame or whatever. But I did see some parallels between the movie and the episode of ‘Hannah Montana’ this morning. I would discuss further, but I highly doubt that anyone reading this has watched both, so it would hardly be worth my time. (Yes, time is so precious now.)

The other three I’ve watched are (in chronological order): ‘Year One’, ‘Bruno’ and ‘Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince’. I would expect that enough people have seen those and talked about it to not require me to give further comment here. Yes, I am being quite lazy by not bothering to include more of my opinion and whatever, but I’m tired, and it’s good that I’m even bothering to write anything at all. Not that I don’t like blogging, but I just keep thinking of all this other stuff I could be doing now (sleep included).

I had actually intended to type up some of my notes from last semester. And I am glad to say that I have actually typed up some notes. However, it does fall a bit short of the amount I had aimed to accomplish. But, no matter. There is still time, and there is still intention to type up more notes.

Of course, because I’ve been "going out" so much these holidays, I’ve been eating out a lot, too. And, as that essentially means that meals are my own responsibility, they have been rather inconsistent and sugar-biased. (I’m not totally sure it’s correct to use "biased" in that context, but it just seemed to fit, and I can’t think of a better word at the moment.)

I’ve had so much sugar. It doesn’t help that sugar, in all its many forms and guises, is so tempting – ice-cream, cupcakes, milkshakes, waffles, cakes, tarts, pies, coffee, chocolate, biscuits, cereal, pastries, donuts – the list goes on and on. Of course, my salt and oil and whatever else intake can’t have been so great either. But how can one refuse something that’s just asking to be eaten? I’ve been eating at places I’ve never eaten at before, though – broadening my culinary experiences.

I’m too tired to write more now. Sleep deprived even in the holidays. Now, that is not quite right. But it is not completely wrong either. There is simply too much to do. A little sleep can be sacrificed here and there.

into the abyss

Finally, after, like, ten days of holidays, I have a full day at home. Not even going to step outside the house. Just going to sit here and do nothing. Oh, such is the life!

I only got up at, like, 12pm today. It’s weird to think about it, but, even though we’re getting well into evening now, I’ve only been awake for about six hours. Six hours isn’t that much, really. And, to think about it, I haven’t really done much in the six hours that I’ve been awake today.

Have mostly just been concerned about finding a placement site for next semester. I shall have to go apply at some places tomorrow. Spent quite some time today doing up my CV. Would have gone around to some pharmacies today, but I figured, seeing as it was late afternoon by the time I finished with my CV, it’d be better to wait until tomorrow morning. Will have to get up bright and early tomorrow, and head out first thing in the morning.

It’s a shame they didn’t pick places for us like they did last year. In the end, I didn’t mind having to travel over five zones to get to my placement site. It’s quite nice out there, anyway. I suppose some proximity to home would have been nice, though. If there’s one thing I know from these last six or so months, it’s that time is limited.

I don’t suppose anyone needs reminding that results come out this week. I don’t think I’m particularly looking forward to getting results, but I’m not that apprehensive either. I’d like to know what I got and how I went, but I don’t think I’ll be staying up on Tuesday night just for that. Remembering that, at the end of last year, I stayed up refreshing sinet over and over to no avail (I gave up after about half an hour or an hour, if I remember correctly) isn’t exactly that encouraging of staying up again this time.

Anyway, back to the point, which is, of course, nothingness. Before holidays started, I think I anticipated a lot of nothingness. I mean, winter holidays are four weeks. There isn’t really that much that needs doing. Logically, that would mean a fair amount of time left over for doing nothing. But, after ten days of holidays, I have realised that a fair bit of that nothing time is used to think of things to do get rid of.. nothing time.

Such a shame that nothing kills nothing. But, being people – being human – we have dreams and aspirations and desires. It is hardly possible to block these things out completely. We always want something else, and, of what we already have, we want more or better. If you crave that feeling of accomplishment and achievement, then nothing is something that must be avoided or otherwise overcome.

…unless, of course, if nothing is what you want to accomplish. It may be argued, even, that it is just as hard to accomplish nothing as it is to accomplish something. (This reminds me of how people say it’s just as hard, if not harder, to get an OP25 than to get an OP1.) So, really, those who do absolutely nothing these holidays and can feel satisfied with that – those people are just as admirable as those who fill their days with constant activity, and shudder at the thought of nothingness.

But, as for myself, I believe in having things in moderation. Well, some things, anyway. Like, some things you should only have now and then. But, then again, I thought I’d long since done away with that word – "should". It is one thing to know what one should do, and another to be able to act on it. After all, "should" and "want" do not always agree. We should have things – including nothingness – in moderation, but we may very well want more or less than whatever is meant by "moderation".

If we say that we live in a free country, then to live within the confines of "should" and "moderation" and words of the like could hardly qualify as living at all. We would be merely existing. Sure, we need some restraints – of the moral and legal variety – but we are told that we have freedom, so that is what we ought to have.

I’m going to stop now before I start some sort of revolt. My plan was to do a great deal of nothing, and leading a revolution just does not quite seem to fit into that plan. On a different matter: I think I should be surprised if I ever write a blog entry with clear direction, and one in which I do not go off on tangents and ramble on. Effort in that respect does not seem to be something I’m willing to expend.